It's Okay to Feel: Supporting Your Team Through Grief
Grief is a universal experience yet it’s still treated as an outlier at work.
Whether it’s the loss of a loved one, a relationship ending, or the grief that comes with big life shifts like redundancy or serious illness, grief doesn’t follow a timeline or fit neatly into policy.
And yet, workplaces often struggle to acknowledge it.
If we want to build stronger, more human organisations, we have to start by recognising grief for what it is: a normal, human response to loss in all its forms.
The Many Faces of Grief
The COVID-19 pandemic may feel like a distant memory, but it marked a period of global loss.
We lost routines, stability, a sense of safety, and for some, entire identities.
We mourned jobs that disappeared overnight, relationships that cracked under pressure, and futures we thought we were working towards. This kind of grief known as “living losses” doesn’t come from death, but it carries emotional weight just the same.
It shows up quietly in team meetings, inbox delays, last-minute cancellations, or simply a shift in someone’s energy.
What Grief Actually Looks Like
Contrary to popular belief, grief doesn’t unfold in neat “stages.” That model, while still quoted, wasn’t designed for workplace or long-term grief. A more accurate and compassionate way to understand it is through the Dual Process Model by Stroebe and Schut.
This model suggests that people oscillate between:
Loss-oriented coping – feeling the pain, sadness, and emotional overwhelm
Restoration-oriented coping – handling practical changes and adjusting to new realities
This back-and-forth is natural, healthy, and non-linear.
People might show up one day feeling okay, and the next, feel like they’re starting over. It’s not regression, it’s part of how we process.
"Grief doesn’t hit us in tidy phases and stages, nor is it something that we forget and move on from; it is an individual process that has a momentum of its own." – Julia Samuel MBE
Bringing Humanity Back to the Workplace
Grief is inconvenient. It’s unpredictable. But that doesn’t mean it should be hidden or ignored.
People don’t stop grieving just because they’re on a Zoom call. And pretending otherwise only creates cultures of silence.
Workplaces that acknowledge grief foster loyalty, psychological safety, and stronger team connections. It’s time to build environments where people feel supported not pressured to “move on.”
What Managers and Founders Can Do
You don’t need to be a grief expert. You just need to lead with care.
Acknowledge the loss
A simple “I’m so sorry. How are you doing today?” goes a long way.
Silence often feels like avoidance.Offer flexibility
Adjust workloads, extend leave, offer remote days. Small shifts help people breathe.Create space for choice
Some people want to talk. Others don’t. Make both okay.Signpost mental health support
Partner with services who know how to support grieving employees.Help managers feel equipped
Most people aren’t taught how to lead with empathy. Offer them guidance, not guesswork.
Trusted Resources
The Self Space – Contemporary mental health services for individuals and businesses. Their podcast Not Suitable for Work opens up workplace taboos, including grief.
Cruse Bereavement Support – Resources and helplines for people facing bereavement.
The Grief Gang Podcast – Honest conversations around grief, loss, and life afterwards.
Nora McInerny’s Work – Author and host of Terrible, Thanks For Asking, exploring real grief with humour and honesty.
Final Thought
By integrating these practices and perspectives, workplaces can become more than just productive they can become human.
It’s okay to feel.
And it’s more than okay to make space for others to feel too.